Andy Sauer
In July, I received an invitation to my childhood friend Chris’ 50th surprise birthday party.
When receiving such a piece of correspondence, two things hit you: First, how easy it is to go so long without seeing the closest friends in your life. Second, are we really that old?
As a kid, Chris was gregarious and adventurous – charming peers and adults alike. Ever inquisitive, he paid attention to whatever anyone was saying and asked thoughtful questions demonstrating interest in them and whatever they had to say. Girls fell for him. Guys wanted to be friends with him. And, he possessed the perfect ratio of recklessness to responsibility that made hanging out with him a blast.
When we were 12, we hiked to a ridge that overlooked our development. At it’s summit was a pine tree, rising almost 100 feet. Without hesitation Chris began climbing it, using the stumps of old branches as precarious footholds. He urged me on. No way, too dangerous, I said. He went higher, pushing me to follow. He reached the top, and insisted that I was missing the greatest view ever and to get up there. The first 20 feet were terrifying, but he guided me until we were atop the tree, which had been truncated by a storm, leaving a lone branch as its pinnacle. We could see our neighborhood and the lives in motion within it. Chris then climbed onto the last branch, balanced himself and stood higher than the tree itself. Of course, there was no peace until I did the same. I stood only as high as I could without releasing one hand, but it was enough to reveal the distant skyline of New York City reflecting the sunlight of the late afternoon.
I recounted that story when I was asked to speak at the party. Of the 100+ in attendance, there were many who, like me, had found themselves the better for having been friends with Chris.
Years ago, when I got an offer out of college from a small newspaper to be one of its underpaid editors, it was Chris who urged me to forget about the money and focus on the experience. I took the job. When you trace the arc of your life, you begin to recognize the people who had such a force of personality that they actually bent your course, sending you to a place you wouldn’t have reached were it not for their undeniable gravity.
And, when I look back on all of it, he was right. The view’s amazing.